THE JOURNEY

Noah...

Today was our last day with our little friend, Noah. He has been a part of our family for a few days a week since he was 8 months. And now at just over 22 months we said goodbye. Having baby sat various children over the years from my years as a Nanny/au-pair to different friends children for longer term, I always struggle with this moment when you change that normality in the childs life and take a much smaller, if any, role. I worry that it emotionally damages them when you have been so important to them. 

Noah had quite a few problems when he first came to me, would not drink from a bottle or eat, had difficulty sleeping. It was quite a challenge. I am proud to say you would never know it now, he is happy, chatty, eats, sleeps and is alot of fun.

When I think of the security and love he has received in this home from all of us. How he has had 3 big brothers who doted on him and played and read to him whenever he wanted. I am thankful that I/we have had the opportunity to invest in this little guys so early on in his life. I am thankful for the colourfulness and laughs he has added to our family. And I dont feel so bad! I feel thankful.....and am ready to move on for whats next in my life. We will miss you Noah!

New amazing gadget...

So I have the new iPhone since this morning. I am posting this from this amazing new toy. Sure the keyboard is small, but I am getting used to it already.

More later. I have to raid the apple store for cool new apps for the iPhone first...

Looking for something in between...

I was sitting in the waiting room of our Dentist when my phone rang. I was struggling with the worst tooth-ache I’ve had in a very long time: it had pretty much kept me up for two nights in a row (Ibuprofen and Paracetamol lost the battle to this pain). But it’s summer-time, and people are on holiday, and so our local Dentist was understaffed and the earliest he could see me was Wednesday.

I made myself this ice-pack, cycled to my Dentist (he is that close and Dutch people cycle everywhere under all conditions) and I am sitting there, counting the minutes when my phone goes. It’s Jan, my friendly garage-manager, who has had my trusted Ford Mondeo under his care for the last few years. My car is in his workshop for its annual government-required check-up known as APK. Every year this is a bit of a test of my patience and trust: we do not exactly have a new car and there is always something wrong with it. Something that will usually cost hundreds of Euros.

So I am sitting in the Dentist’s office, nursing the mother of all tooth-aches when my Garage-friend calls: Rogier, I think you need to think about a new car. I can fix this, but it will cost you too much – and I am not sure that your car will bring you even half-way your intended holiday… Not exactly the message I was hoping for. Not exactly great timing either…

Did I mention we need to drive to Hungary for the annual CA conference in a week or so? After that we intend to drive to France where we can stay in a friend’s house for a week. That’s an approximate 3000lm we intend to drive. “Yeah,” says my garage-friend, “I don’t think your car will finish the first 800.” What is not working anymore? Too much to mention. Stuff is going wrong in the engine. The power-steering is breaking. You need four new tires. The cooling system has a mystery-leak.

Too make a long story short, the dentist fixed my tooth (root-canal, baby…) and I went home and had a long talk with Sophie. Thankfully, we have some money coming back from the Dutch tax Office. We had other intentions for that money, but there you go: that’s life. We have started the car-hunting process: looking for that rare-gem that will help us the next 7 years drive another 200.000 km (preferably more). We have spent countless hours already comparing cars and asking ourselves all kinds of questions. What do we need? What fits our three boys? How much car do we get for how much money? A navigational system would be nice… What is the best choice for the environment? What is the best choice given the increasing price of fuel… Stuff like that. We are looking for something in between the two pictures at the top: all options are still open (though the car we buy will probably be closer to the picture on the left…)

Your prayers for our decision-making are appreciated. A car is a rather large investment for us...

We have an ECFA; now we need an ECRA!

Back in the 70's (and 80's) a number of evangelical organisations came under fire for lack of healthy financial accountability. It was too easy for people to run off with the money; too easy to resort to bad fundraising techniques; too easy to mess up the bookkeeping and IRS declarations. To help evangelical organisations the ECFA was started, the 'Evangelical Council for Financial Accountability. These days, when an organisation is ECFA-certified in the US, you know its books are in order and its financial practices are healthy.

These days, however, evangelicals get into trouble for very different reasons. It's name-calling, accusations, mean-spirited debates and political debates and dishonesty that gets them in the news. Every time this happens (and since this is an election-year in the US it happens a lot) non-Christians shake their head in amazement and step away from Jesus and the church another little step.

In this excellent post, author Brian McLaren asks if it is not time for an ECRA - an evangelical council for rhetorical accountability. This week Presidential candidate Barack Obama came under heavy fire from Focus-on-the-Family founder James Dobson. The latter said a number of things about Obama that were ugly, nasty and (some at least) clearly not true. But it gets you in the limelight, draws attention to your cause and hurts a candidate you don't like all the same time — and all in the name of 'good Christian faith'!

I get so tired of James Dobson and some of his friends. I know many christians revere and love the man, but I honestly think he does more harm than good. Everytime I meet a non-Christian American, and many times I meet European non-Christian, and we talk about matters of faith, I meet so much resistence. This resistence is fed-into by evangelicals like Dobson who cannot keep their mouth shut and realize that the world does not understand what they are saying - or even the language they are using.

The problem is not that Dobson has a conviction. The problem is the way the conviction is voiced. And that is where I think McLaren's suggestion is very helpful.

Or actually: suggesstions. Because McLaren doesn't just suggest we need an ECRA — he suggests 7 guidelines for our speech. And that is where his article is most helpful. I encourage you to read it and to examine your own speech as you do.

[I have had the privilige of meeting McLaren on a number of occassions and I can say this: what he advocates here is very much the way himself operates. I have never heard McLaren speak harshly about his (many) critics and his speaking has always been seasoned richly with grace!

A new initiative in Rotterdam

I had a great conversation today with the missionary pastor of a Dutch Reformed Church in Rotterdam (Lisplein church, pictured). He wanted to meet with me after hearing about the project I have been facilitating in Utrecht at the Symposium with Stuart Murray. Turns out a small community is starting to emerge out of the Alpha courses this traditional has been running. A number of people have come to genuine faith, but they do not feel at home in the larger church. Question that started the conversation was 'could a new community be birthed out of this - and if so, how?'

A great question, of course! We walked around Rotterdam for two hours discussing different possibilities and coming up with a possible strategy. That makes for a fun conversation that I really enjoyed!

It points to a deeper problem, though, and I have been thinking about this for some time now. Alpha courses all over Europe are creating the same problem: people come to faith, but the environment in which they do so looks nothing like the church that hosts the Alpha Course. The result is that the new Christians do not integrate into the churchh at large, but keep 'dangling by the side.' As Stuart Murray says, Alpha is an effective disciple making strategy that is tied onto the church like a foreign entity.

What can be done? I can think of a  number of different possibilities — none of which are easy.

• We can try to integrate the new Christians into the existing Church even though they don't feel like it. Sounds cruel, but doesn't have to be. This is what we tried in Crossroads while I was there and we had varying degrees of success. In hindsight not my favorite approach...
• We can create a new community for the new Christians. This is what the missionary pastor today suggested. Definitely a possibility. However, starting a new community is time-intensive. How do you ensure quality? What about the mother-congregation?
• Lastly the option no one is discusing (as far as I know): how about creating a seperate Alpha-church? What if we created a new church where all Alpha converts could go? One which mirrored Alpha in style and vitality, yet stimulated people to continue growing?
  Ah, I know the problem. Alpha is often started to help this church over here grow. If the converts disappear and join that new church over there, that church grows, but we don't...
  This argument is understandable, but does not seem very Kingdom-focused. If I can help the Kingdom expand over there, even while the part I am doing here then doesn't grow, should I not be happy for the growth over there?

I wonder what you think. How should the church deal with this challenge? Should we be territorial about 'our converts'? Should we try to force them into the mothership? Should all these churches start new small communities? Or perhaps there is an option I am missing...

A BBQ And two church plant proposals

Tonight marked the completion of the Utrecht-project for me. Since November of last year I have been involved in a churchplanting project for the Reformed Church of the Netherlands. The objective was to bring a group of people from within that church together and help them develop a vision for a new church plant.

We spent January and February on developing the program and recruiting the participants. We started our first meeting late february and since then we have met 10 times as a group. In April it became obvious two different visions were emerging and so we formed two groups.

In May and June we developed an understanding of the respective target groups, and we formulated vision and strategy.

I am really excited by what I have seen in the last 6 months. My perspective on the possibilities within the Reformed Church have changed rather significantly: I am greatly encouraged by the spiritual life and passion within the church — and the freedom she is now willing to give to pioneers and new initiatives.

The BBQ tonight was a lot of fun. They thanked me with some fun gifts: a small fig-tree with two branches (how appropriate) that will be put in a prominent place in our garden — and two books: 'The History of God' by Karen Armstrong and 'Rules and Ordinances of the Dutch Reformed Church' (which they felt I 'should' have). We had fun with those two books. Apparently more than a few people have 'lost their faith' because of Armstrong's best-selling book. My friends in Utrecht felt that if my faith should weaken as a result of this book the 'rules and ordinances' would help me find my way on the path again :-).

But the best part of the evening was when they handed me two project-proposals. That really did mark the completion of the process! I took a picture of the gifts and the proposals, just so you could see them!

I am excited about the two project-proposals and the communities and the enthusiasm they represent. I believe both are credible initiatives and I look forward to seeing how they will develop. I have made a number of new and meaningful relationships in Utrecht. My intent is to stay connected and somewhat involved, even if I have to be at a distance! I pray and wish them every blessing as they set out realizing their plans!

Blood and guts and bad parenting

I know I am going to get in trouble for this post...

Joshua turned 15 on Sunday (Yeah!). I think 15 is quite an age; when I was young I always wanted to be 15. It's like ... almost mature. So what did he want for his birthday? Well at the top of his list was a Playstation game 'Call of Duty.' The idea behind the game is that you are a soldier on a mission and you have to kill as many bad guys as you can. The graphics are incredibly realistic: you see people exploding as you shoot them.

Mind you, when we gave him the game I had no idea it would be so realistic! (Didn't you do any research, I hear you ask. Well, I did — but clearly not enough).

Why did we give him the game? I really didn't want to. But he has few other interests and it was clear he really wanted this game. Sophie and I have never allowed the boys to even play such games, but as Sophie said: "how long are we going to tell him he cannot have a game like that?" and "Do we really want to keep Joshua from playing a game like that, because Joel shouldn't see it?" So, Sunday came around, and out came the game. Joshua was, of course, very excited.

I, however, wasn't. From the very first moment he put the game in the Playstation I was upset by the game. One strength of the game is its realism; another is they way you can play Online. We had just registered the Playstation online, and because I don't our boys doing things online I don't know about, we used my name. Now Joshua is playing 'Call of Duty' online — on my name!

He gets shot all the time. The screen turns red, you see the inside of your eye-balls; then the camera zooms out and there is your body, lying on the floor. My son gets shot in a terrible war! Or, since they are using my alias: I get shot!
And my son shoots people, and they die. He aims his gun, you see the cross-hairs; he pulls the trigger, and they fall to the ground while blood explodes everywhere (he's very good)! Every time I see it I cringe...

What's a father to do? It's not that I don't understand. It's the fun of the hunt; the excitement of shoot or get-shot. It's not like I didn't play 'soldier' or 'cowboys and indjuns' when I grew up. My lego-guns were very realistic (at least to me)!
But I wanted to raise a son who abhorred violence (and violent games), who loved peace and took care of the sick and the wounded. I feel like a failure as a dad (of course a little proud of his incredible marksmanship, even if its only on the Playstation :-). Here I am planting 'communities-of-faith' around Europe that exist 'for the good of the world' (to quote one of my prefered theologians, NT Wright), while my son is going around from battle-field to battle-field, killing man after man...

How do I parent him now, now that he is playing 'Call of Duty', killing other people under my name and dying a hundred times a day himself in a war-torn landscape, far away from home, where I cannot help him as he bleeds to death? How do I parent him now, now that a Computer game is helping him become acquainted with guns and turning him into a killing-machine!?

I walk around the room making comments like 'Ouch!' and 'Don't kill him!' and 'Shoot the legs instead...' I make my discomfort very known by sighing deeply and over-acting my disgust (which amuses everyone and is taken serious by no one). I realize I have failed as a parent letting him have this game in the first place... This is the best parenting I know to do now, under these circumstances...

Do the numbers 4-1 mean anything to you?

And here I wasn't going to blog about the European Soccer championships at all... Anyway, fund to watch the game with friends...

Something beautiful is happening in Overvecht

Overvecht is one of those urban areas where the word 'beautiful' is strangely out of place. An area with high-rise architecture on the brink of being torn down again, poverty, crime, illiteracy and all the other problems associated with the city, Overvecht is on an official list as 'an area in urgent need of help.'

But there is a group of young Christians that is making a commitment to living there and getting involved and forming community and reaching out. It is beautiful to see. I was their guest tonight and we talked about church planting: what would a new church, one effective in reaching out to this community, look like?

Here are two pictures: we sat on the floor of a small apartment with 16 people and talked for a long time. People sometimes ask me how you plant a church. Well, these pictures show a big part of it: you sit on the floor with people with passion and you talk about possibilities. And then you pray.

 

Holland has a new church planting network!

Today I attended a seminar on the subject of church planting in The Hague. The seminar, given by Stuart Murray, was put on by Urban Expressions, the organisation that Stuart heads up.

The seminar today also marked the start of Urban Expression Holland. Fellow-church planters Matthijs and Lindsey Vlaardingebroek and ther friend Oeds Blok head this up. The vision of Urban Expression is to encourage church planting in urban areas among the poor and marginalized. In this they are quite different from Christian Associates, of which Sophie and I are part. CA seeks to also reach people in the urban aras of Europe, but our vision is to rach the young and upwardly mobile people. Our belief is that these are tomorrow’s leaders, and impacting them will mean we get to impact Europe. Having said all that, Sophie and I (and others within CA) love Matthijs and Lindsey and applaud the work they do! We are excited that Urban Expression is here and look forward to working together with them. Most of all, we look forward to journeying together.

The challenge of Stuart Murray... ehhh, I mean Post Christendom!

I attended a national meeting of pastors in the Dutch Reformed Church today. Stuart Murray was the speaker for the day. As far as I am concerned; Stuart is the authority on church planting; his book ‘church planting’ is pretty much the standard work on the thing that I have chosen to make my profession.

But the Dutch Reformed Church asked Stuart to speak about another subject, ‘The End of Christendom.’ He argues that the era of Christendom has now come to an end - and this, in his view, is a good thing!

I love the quiet British demeanor with which Stuart delivers that message to a group of 400 (mostly very traditional) Dutch reformed pastors! His two speeches contained some real pointed remarks. No surprise then that the response was quite critical. The organisation had asked two people to respond; both responses were not very helpful (in my view). 

I think Stuart is right. We live in a new world and it is terribly confusing. I think it confuses all of us; and yes, it really confuses me too. 

One thing Stuart said that really struck a cord with me was this: he asked if it would be helpful to look at ourselves in this new world through the same eyes as the people of Israel  during the time of the exile to Babylon. Like the children of Israel who were longing for their homeland and sad about its demise (Ps 137) we often can long back for the time when the church was large and strong, and faith was relatively simple. Like the children of Israel, we can try to get back to that era, back to that understanding of the world. But an interesting thing happens to the exiles in Babylon: while they are making every effort to go home, back to where they came from and the life they knew, the prophet Jeremiah tells them to stay and to engage with the city. “You are going to be here a while,” he says, “get involved and get used to it.”

This is what the LORD Almighty, the God of Israel, says to all those I carried into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: 5 "Build houses and settle down; plant gardens and eat what they produce. 6 Marry and have sons and daughters; find wives for your sons and give your daughters in marriage, so that they too may have sons and daughters. Increase in number there; do not decrease. 7 Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the LORD for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper."

Hmmm... that keeps going through my mind again and again. Seek the peace... Build houses... Plant gardens.... Seek the prosperity of the city... If it prospers, so will you. 

Tony Blair's faith

You may want to read this excellent article on Tony Blair's faith. It describes how he came to faith in his college-days, how he has been searching spiritually all his life, how his faith has influenced and motivated his career and how he now tries to 'be a blessing' in his role as UN-envoy to the Middle East. Very impressive and insightful!

A couple of observations from my side:

• It is popular to accuse politicians of wanting to be in office for selfish reasons only. While I also suspect that some run for office out of selfish ambition, I think many seek office because they want to make a difference in this world. I think Mr. Blair is a good example.
• There are more and more politicians and artists for whom faith is important, but who do not use their faith as a means to political gain. In my perception, their faith is sincere and deep and motivational to them, yet they refuse to make it an issue of their politics, their choices or their public perception. I find their faith 'postmodern,' in that they don't fight for absolutes but rather welcome the conversation; I find their faith mature in that it does not become a selling-point and they refuse to become entrenched; yet their faith continually motivates them to keep going on in their efforts for a better world.

A family does Serve The City

Sophie, the boys and I have been working with Serve The City Amsterdam for the past three days. Today will be the last day. Yesterday the boys were part of the basketball clinic; Sophie cooked all day and I shot video all day. Today is the last day: Serve The City is participating in a large festival with live music, lots of fun and free food and games. Sorry, I’ve been shooting video and that will appear on Youtube no doubt in the future. For right now, no media…

An important night in Utrecht!

I came back from Holiday and dove straight into the Utrecht project. Tonight was an important night! We are just past the half-way point in the process and it now looks like the project is going to result not in on, but in two church plants!

Here’s what has happened so far:

• We talked about ‘missional church planting’: what it is and how you do it.
• We then spent three evenings looking at inspiring examples of church planting: Matthijs and Lindsey’s work in The Hague; Redeemer in New York and Amsterdam, and Crossroads Rotterdam.
• All the while we have been talking about vision and trying to specify what it is that we want to see.

As I have interacted the 35-or so participants in the process it became clear there were really two visions that were emerging: one group of people have a vision for a church of 30-somethings (well-educated, tomorrow’s leaders, our friends and neighbors); the other group wants to see a church community come into existence in a specific neighborhood with lots of Turks and Moroccans.

Tonight we divided the whole group into these subgroups for the first time. For the rest of our time together they will work on vision, target-audience and strategy. By the end pf June this should result in two church planting proposals that will then be brought to the denomination for consideration.

I am excited about this process. Is it fragile? Yes, it is: very fragile. But I see lots of good things; I see passion and commitment; I see wisdom growing and insight being sought. I think these two projects have a real chance of both becoming a reality!

Back from Holiday

Well, we are back from 10 days of holiday in England. After the week we spent together in Porlock on Exmoor as a family we all went to Exeter, where Sophie’s mom and sister live. From there we went to Crackington — the place on the northern Cornish coast where Sophie spent all her summers growing up. It is a tiny beach place, absolutely beautiful that never seems to change. The weather was amazing; the boys had a great time climbing rocks, building fortresses and fishing for crabs. I did some really wonderful photography and finally managed to empty my head of all my worries and fears. Here are some pictures.

We drove back to Holland on Thursday. The next project evening for the Utrecht project was that evening and I was really scared I would miss the boat again (as we did on the way to England due to traffic). So we left really early and I drove very fast (Exeter-Dover: departure 5:11 AM; arrival in Dover 9:34 AM!). We did not miss the ferry: in fact, we caught an earlier ferry (the 10 AM instead of the 12 AM).